Amber Heard admits she 'still loves' Johnny Depp and realises she's not a 'perfect victim'

15 June 2022, 20:39 | Updated: 15 June 2022, 20:41

Amber Heard admitted she "still loves" Johnny Depp and has realised she is not a "perfect victim" in her first interview since their high-profile libel case.

In her first interview since losing her court battle against the Pirates of the Caribbean star, Ms Heard said she "absolutely" still loves her ex-husband.

The 36-year-old actress also said she fears she could be "silenced" from speaking out in future.

She told NBC Today's Savannah Guthrie she has "no bad feelings or ill will" towards Mr Depp following their high-profile court case, which came to a close just two weeks ago.

She insisted she did the best she could to make a "deeply broken relationship work" but realised she was not a "likeable victim".

Asked whether she still had love for Mr Depp, she replied: "Yes, absolutely. I love him.

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"I loved him with all my heart and tried the best I could to make a deeply broken relationship work. And I couldn't.

"I have no bad feelings or ill will towards him at all. I know that might be hard to understand.

"Or it might be really easy to understand if you have just ever loved anyone... It should be easy."

She also addressed a text message shown in evidence in which Mr Depp appeared to threaten her with "total global humiliation".

Asked whether he had achieved that, Ms Heard said: "I know he promised it. I testified to this. I am not a good victim, I get it. I am not a likeable victim. I am not a perfect victim.

"But when I testified I asked the jury to see me as human and here, his own words, which is a promise to do this, it seems as though he has."

Two weeks ago, the jury found a 2018 article that Ms Heard wrote for the Washington Post about her experiences as a survivor of domestic abuse to be defamatory.

Mr Depp consistently denied during his own evidence the "outrageous, outlandish" claims of abuse.

The 59-year-old was awarded $10.35 million (£8.2m) in damages.

Johnny Depp performs with Jeff Beck on stage in Sheffield

Ms Heard won on one count of her countersuit, successfully arguing that her ex-husband's press agent defamed her by claiming her allegations were "an abuse hoax" aimed at capitalising on the #MeToo movement.

The jury awarded her $2m (£1.5m) in damages.

The six-week trial also saw Heard challenged over why she had not yet donated her seven million dollar (£5.7 million) divorce settlement to charities as promised.

"I made a pledge and that pledge is made over time by its nature," she explained.

But Ms Guthrie interjected: "If you say you donated, you know that everybody thinks that you have donated it, not that you have pledged it.

"And for the jury sitting there, do you think they felt like that was you getting caught in a lie?"

Heard replied: "I don't know because I feel like so much of the trial was meant to cast aspersions on who I am as a human, my credibility, to call me a liar in every way you can.

"This is another one of the examples where if you pull back and you think about it, I shouldn't have to have donated it in an effort to be believed.

"I shouldn't have had to earmark the entirety of that."

During the interview she was asked whether she feels nervous about what she can now say.

She said she "took for granted" what she "assumed" was her "right to speak".

"I am scared that, no matter what I do, no matter what I say or how I say it, every step that I take will present another opportunity for silencing, which I guess is what a defamation lawsuit is meant to do - it is meant to take your voice."

Ms Heard's new interview aired on NBC Today on Tuesday and Wednesday, with more airing on Friday during a special Dateline show.